By Deacon Peggy Hahn (she/her), Co-Director at LEAD
 

The day after spending five days with my six grandchildren (ages 9-14) I slept until noon. I haven’t done that since…hmmm, the day after volunteering at the ELCA Youth Gathering last summer. And, I hadn’t done that since…hmmm, the day after my mom’s funeral. All very different types of tired. The physical exhaustion with muscle aches I didn’t know was possible, the mental exhaustion after a week of rapid-fire decision-making left my brain weary, and the weight of grief after my losing my mom felt like an emotional weight I physically couldn’t shake. Our “tired” isn’t all the same – and neither is our rebound.  

What kind of tiredness is wearing you out this summer – and what can you do about it?  

Physical Exhaustion: This is used up physical capacity due to too much activity, lack of sleep, depression and anxiety, or other physical concerns leads to irritability and increased stress. If we get rest or needed medical care, this kind of tired can bring a renewed feeling of being alive!  

Mental Exhaustion: This is decision fatigue with overwhelming demands often producing burnout, due to enormous responsibility. If we can step away to let the dust settle, focus on what we have learned and how we are reshaped by these demands, we can be strengthened with renewed knowledge and capacity.  

Emotional Exhaustion: This is brain fog, memory difficulties, or grief that takes a toll resulting in anger, frustration, sadness, or even self-abuse or the abuse of others. If we can heal, get outside help, and genuine restorative support from trusted people, we can become resilient.  

Social Exhaustion: This is people overload, with extended socialization that leaves us feeling wiped out and is especially challenging for introverts. If we can manage our social engagements based on our individual need for companionship or alone time, we can become self-aware, and other-aware.  

Moral Injury Exhausted: This is values violation, disrespected identity, and assimilation (code-switching) which impacts our ability to trust others or even ourselves. When this persists, it is devastating to us individually and corporately, often resulting in destructive behaviors and practices, most often on others different than ourselves. When we have the support we need, we can reclaim our strength to love ourselves and support others through their journey of self-love.  

Sometimes we just need time, but more often than not we need support. Care from a friend, partner, employer, or professional can be just the reboot we need. Don’t wait to ask for help. The summer is a great time for self-healing. The older I get the more I realize that life is not a race, it is not even a marathon. It is a category all to itself because no amount of training can truly prepare us for the experiences we will face. Thankfully there are resources all around us if we can get the strength and courage to ask for help. When in doubt, I turn to this familiar and beloved prayer: 

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change; 
courage to change the things I can; 
and wisdom to know the difference.
Amen. 

– Reinhold Niebuhr (1892-1971)